11 Essential Queer Pregnancy Books
Hooray, you’re pregnant! Hooray, you’re queer! Welcome to the wonderful world of LGBTQIA+ pregnancy! It’s a land where strangers are suddenly interested in exactly what’s going on here and how that happened. (Details! They need them!) Obviously Book Riot is here to hook you up with queer pregnancy books. If What To Expect When You’re Expecting left you cold, you’re in good company. Let’s queer your second trimester.
There are a few caveats here. First, I had trouble finding books about queer pregnancy by, for, or about people of color. While the following recommendations are not queer, they may be good supplements for lack of better options. Definitely check out Black, Pregnant and Loving It: The Comprehensive Pregnancy Guide for Today’s Woman of Color by Yvette Allen-Campbell and Dr. Suzanne Greenidge-Hewitt; The Mocha Manual to a Fabulous Pregnancy by Kimberly Seals-Allers; and Like a Mother: A Feminist Journey Through the Science and Culture of Pregnancy by Angela Garbes. Also consider reading Revolutionary Mothering: Love On The Front Lines edited by Alexis Pauline Gumbs. Finally, Autostraddle has an excellent piece by Asher Jak that discusses queer Black pregnancy from a firsthand perspective.
Second, there’s not much out there about genderqueer, intersex, and asexual pregnancy. For people seeking resources around these topics, check out this list of intersex advocacy organizations worldwide and the website of The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project.
And Baby Makes More: Known Donors, Queer Parents, and Our Unexpected Families Edited by Susan Goldberg and Chloë Brushwood Rose
This is one of the only queer pregnancy books in print that discusses the complicated relationship that queer couples may have with genetic donors. It includes contributions from queer parents, donors, and children.
Baby Love: Choosing Motherhood After a Lifetime of Ambivalence by Rebecca Walker
Bisexual memoirist Rebecca Walker never thought she’d want to have a baby…until she did. Follow her emotional journey in this true tale of how she decided, at last, to embark on a pregnancy of her own.
Dads: A Gay Couple’s Surrogacy Journey in India by Hans M. Hirschi
Surrogacy is becoming a popular way for gay men to have children, but it comes with some question marks. This is especially the case when wealthier outsiders visit a nation where surrogacy can be either lucrative or exploitative for the people living there. This book explores one gay couple’s navigation of surrogacy in India and all of its complications.
A Gay Couple’s Journey Through Surrogacy: Intended Fathers by Jerry Bigner and Michael Menichiello
Undergoing surrogacy, from the decision stage to the birth, is an emotionally, financially, and practically complicated process. While surrogacy is a shifting landscape, this book presents both a practical and emotional starting point for people considering this option.
Good Talk: A Memoir in Conversations by Mira Jacob
While this graphic memoir isn’t totally about expecting a baby, it does deal a bit with bisexual Mira’s pregnancy in the broader cultural context of her family. Her Indian American parents’ immigration, having a mixed-race son, and mental therapy with Bill Murray all contribute to a touching and thoughtful meditation on belonging and identity.
How We Do Family: From Adoption to Trans Pregnancy, What We Learned about Love and LGBTQ Parenthood by Trystan Reese
Trystan and Biff were already adoptive parents when they decided to have another child. To accomplish this, they decided that Trystan, who is transgender, would be the bearing parent. This book is set to come out in mid-2021, but be sure to bookmark it now.
Labor of Love: The Story of One Man’s Extraordinary Pregnancy by Thomas Beatie
When Thomas Beattie announced that he was seven months pregnant, tabloids were quick to pick up the “sensational” scoop. This book tells the real story of a transgender man who fought for his right to express his true gender and his right to bear children.
My Miserable, Lonely, Lesbian Pregnancy by Andrea Askowitz
There’s a lot of pressure to be happy when you’re pregnant, which is nonsense. If your lover takes off, your parents express reservations, and your hormones go wild, you’re not obligated to throw a party. For people struggling with the long and winding road through pregnancy, this may be the ideal memoir.
Pregnant Butch: Nine Long Months Spent in Drag by A. K. Summers
As a butch lesbian, Teek Thomasson is a little uncomfortable with the idea that she could bear a child. When she embarks upon her pregnancy journey, she must face a host of gender norms, identity questions, and old wives’ tales. This is also one of two of our queer pregnancy books that’s also a graphic novel!
The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians: How to Stay Sane and Care for Yourself from Pre-conception Through Birth by Rachel Pepper
This is one of the original queer pregnancy books, and it’s still chock-full of great advice and anecdotes from people who have actually been there. Better yet, it discusses some methods for getting that positive test when there’s no penis-haver in the picture.
Where’s the Mother?: Stories from a Transgender Dad by Trevor MacDonald and Fiona Giles
It’s safe to say that a lot of queer pregnancy books fail to take into account the reproductive experiences of trans men. That said, a lot of great books about trans pregnancy are coming out these days, and they’re all worth a read! This is another firsthand account of a man’s pregnancy, from dealing with social stigma to breastfeeding after top surgery.
Need more pregnancy books? Yes you do! Here’s 100 of them to start you off.
